Top Three Reasons to Fall in Love

Hani Henry, associate professor of psychology at AUC's Department of Sociology, Anthropology, Psychology and Egyptology, says that Robert Sternberg’s psychological theory addresses the most common reasons we fall in love, which are: passion, intimacy, and commitment.


A basic friendship is a relationship that involves a person falling in love with another person for intimate reasons. It lacks commitment and passion. Henry explained that intimacy isn't just about developing a close bond with someone. "Sometimes it can be self-serving. Everyone likes to feel cared for and loved. Women need to feel their femininity while men desire their masculinity.

The song Hello by Adele is a great example of intimacy. Adele calls her ex-boyfriend in the chorus and vents her pain about the relationship. She says that she hasn’t been able to heal herself after so many years. "Her lyrics are magical and speak for a lot of people who want to have an emotional connection with anyone or a short-term relationship," he said.


It is normal to fall in love with someone because we feel strong feelings or desire for them. Passionate love develops from feelings that lead to sexual attraction and romantic interest. Henry stated, "When someone you like is attracted to you by something that draws them to that person." "The attraction is not just physical. There is also a fascination for the hair, eyes, body."

In the absence of intimacy and commitment, infatuation is developed with the person you love. "People are drawn and quickly develop lust. Some people become obsessed with a person and view them as an object. top attitude status in hindi stated that it is possible to be together for years with someone and not feel a commonality.


Commitment is complete love. He said that people who are looking for commitment seek stability and a healthy relationship. "People who seek only commitment can be unable to find basic friendship and sexual attraction.

Henry says that young adults today are more interested in objects than in relationships. "The objectification comes from consumerism," he explained. "The more consumeristic a culture becomes, then the more people lose interest in commitments. Some youth are more interested than others in pleasing people they don’t care for. All things must be consumed, including relationships with people.

Love Outside the Triangular Theory

Although it's common that anyone can relate to Sternberg's love theory, we all have our personal reasons for falling in love. Science doesn't have to explain why you fall in love. Henry said that personal needs include loneliness, fear, peer pressure, satisfaction, and religious values.

Psychology may have some things to say about love but the love we choose is what defines us. Each of us has our own ways of understanding what makes our lives happy and meets our human needs. "Some people have a need that fulfills all three dimensions of the triangle, and they don't want to give up on any of them because they feel they are being deprived of another dimension. Love is complicated."

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